And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
