if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
