I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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