I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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