It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
