please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize