I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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