I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
