google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
and she was petting her beer can
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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