Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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