So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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