New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
