So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
