fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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