I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Randomize
