why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize