You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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