That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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