It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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