I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
