i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
