yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
