I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
