im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I want to make a zoo with you.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
