Heybabeimwearingurpanties
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
whose ass print is on the piano?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
