Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize