just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize