So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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