hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
