You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
