Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
