The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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