Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
