I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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