Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
