craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
