Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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