girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
