I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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