Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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