Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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