So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
