adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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