Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
