Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
