My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
