pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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