Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
