idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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