you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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