there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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