I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
